Affidavit

AFFIDAVIT OF BECKY J. JOSE
December 2, 2008


I, Becky J. Jose, hereby swear that the following incidences are true and factual:

In August 2007, prior to leaving for a second Afghanistan deployment, my husband, Phillip Jose, was berating me for some perceived wrong I had done and, after an hours long verbal beatdown, I took a rolled-up 20 x 30 poster board photo from our honeymoon and attempted to tear it in half. Phil grabbed it out of my hand, swung it back like a baseball bat, and hit my arm just above the elbow. I was hurt and could not believe he had actually hit me. Our daughter, Rachel, 15, was watching from the end of the hall near her room, and came running to help me and pushed her father away from me. He ran and got ice and even though I didn’t want any or to have him near me, and with our daughter trying to push him away from me, he would not move. He applied a bag of ice to my arm and stated he didn’t want me to bruise and have any evidence for the police that he had hit me. He was yelling and cursing and called our daughter a “fucking whore bitch” and a “ fucking cunt” because she was yelling at him and trying to get him away from me.

Throughout 2006 and 2007, Phil would routinely call Rachel vile and disgusting names because she did not hide the fact that she wanted us to divorce and wanted her father out of the house. Several years ago she brought home a brochure from Women Safe and asked me to call them for help to make her dad stay away from us. The court advocate at the Battered Women’s Shelter office told me that in order to get a Civil Protection Order and get my husband removed from the house, he would have needed to hit me or threaten to kill me and these are the only things that the courts look at in abuse cases. Phil has threatened to burn down our house if I go through with the divorce, quit his job so we would lose our home, threatened to take old very risque photos of me and plaster them all over our oldest children’s high school to humiliate me and our kids and “get us back in line”, he has threatened to kill me many times, has threatened that since I have turned the older children against him that when he gets the little boys I will never see them again, has threatened with our two little boys standing between us, that if I call the police to report him for breaking the protection order, he will drown our little boys in front of me.

Phillip left our house for the last time on 4 September 2007. He drove to our home in Twinsburg from Ft Bragg, NC all night and arrived in the morning. He stated that he had come home one last time, even though he had been ordered not to leave Ft Bragg, to have sex with me. At this time, I had already filed for divorce and the few times we had had sexual relations of any sort in the previous year were when he would coerce me into giving in by verbally beating me down for an average 8 to 12 hours straight everyday he was at our home in Ohio. He would tell me that unless I gave in, he would continue his abuse. If I did give in, he would leave and go back to Ft Bragg. My therapist has told me that this is sexual abuse. He would accuse me of sexual infidelity with every man who looked in my direction to specifically include our son’s soccer coaches, male soccer parents, our neighbors, shoppers in stores, our marriage therapist, Dr. Friedell who Phil referred to as Santa, etc. Phil would block me into our master bath room, our bedroom, or the basement and position himself at the door and would not allow me to leave until he was done. When our children would come to the door because they needed my attention, care, or food, he would not allow me to help them and made them take care of each other. The several times I was able to get away from him by leaving the house, he would get into his car and follow me to the police station. When we arrived, he would stop his raging, psychotic, threatening behavior the second we were in the presence of the police and would attempt to convince the police that I was distraught, crying and upset because I was crazy. In May of 2007, I fled the house early in the day and he caught up to me on the corner of Champion Trail and Post Road, cut me off at the stop sign, got out of his car, walked to my car and began beating on the driver side window and screaming obscenities and me and tried to get me to put down the window so he could “talk” to me. Two neighbors in their homes and the driver that came up behind me, an acquaintance named Showba Mitchell who lives on Burton Dr, all called the police. I backed up and drove to the police station and he followed me. We were passed by four Twinsburg Police cars that were on their way to the scene.

A few times I have tried to sleep in my daughter’s room (queen bed) to get away from my husband or when we had returned to the house after a visit to the police when he would promise them that he would sleep in the basement and leave me alone, he would decide that if I would not sleep in the same bed as him or finish our “discussion”, he would make sure no one slept if he couldn’t. He would bang doors in the kids bathroom/laundry room, has broken the knob on the washer by slamming the washer door against it, broke the dryer door by slamming it, and would continue like this until I got out of bed and would come back to talk to him. He has made big gouge marks in the bathroom door because I went inside and locked the door since I needed to shower and leave the house for some appointment and he wasn’t done with his “discussion”. The master bathroom and bedroom doors are both severely cracked/broken because Phil would slam them during his tirades. Several other doors and door jams need replacing because of Phil’s violent nature.

Phil has taken my keys from me while in the Beachwood Mall parking lot. I was leaving because he had shown up at Dillards angry that I had left the house while he slept. I tried to avoid a public scene so I left and he attempted to take my keys and said that since he paid for the van it was his and was taking it. I did not have keys to his Volvo so I would have been stranded. He physically moved me away from the open van door once I had unlocked it to get inside. He was yelling and screaming obscenities at me and wrestled my keys from me and started to get into the van. Fortunately, someone had called Mall Security and they drove up behind the van and Phil took off running away from the area.

Phil does not believe that his behavior is abusive or that his behavior has had any effect on our children. Our oldest son, William, a senior, 18, is in therapy and was arrested for Domestic Violence over the summer just before his 18th birthday. He was in juvenile detention for 4 nights. Phil has beat William without my knowledge, has made him stand in the basement for over 4 hours holding 30 pound weights in each hand while he lectured him and would not let him sit or rest, would hold “training” sessions for myself and the older two children, would make William and Rachel do huge cleanup jobs that would last an 8 hour day in the basement or garage while he would supervise and not actually help.

Phil has always had huge issues with reckless behavior while driving. He has been stopped by police in several states no less than 50 times in the last 5 years. He always gets a warning because he gives them his “just back from Afghanistan and going to see my family” speech. He hands his military ID with his drivers license in which he is wearing his Army uniform. His uniform, highly decorated, is always hanging in the back drivers side window. He was stopped once with our oldest son, William, in the car by an undercover, off-duty police officer who could not write him a ticket since he had no radar but estimated Phil’s speed at over 90 mph. Phil seemed proud, as usual, to have gotten out of it. I was aware of his driving and never let him drive when we were all together. He did get a ticket in Kentucky a few years ago for going 106mph in a 65mph zone and was cited for speeding and reckless driving. He should, however, have had his car impounded for going that fast. Before I was aware of Phil’s reckless driving issue, he was driving us from one shopping center across the street to another on 20 Dec 1987, one and a half years into our marriage. He approached the light as it turned red, he came almost to a complete stop and then gunned the gas pedal attempting to make it across a five lane 35mph road. We were t-boned by a F250 pickup truck and I was in the hospital for 4 weeks with a triple pelvic fracture, broken ribs, a bruised and collapsed lung which eventually had to be aspirated, and sciatic nerve damage in my right hip and leg. I had four months of intensive physical therapy in order to straighten my leg due to atrophy and then be able to walk. I had four c-sections as a result of the injuries from this reckless driving incident. Thanks to therapy, I no longer refer to this as an accident.

Phil has never been a father to our youngest two children. He was never a hands-on dad, never fed or cared for any of our children. Never even drove with Harrison and Cameron alone ever until they were 7 and 6 years old. He had called me back from a shopping trip to Beachwood Mall with Rachel and a friend. Cameron had an accident in his pull-up at 3 ½ and Phil refused to change him and made me come home. He has smacked our little boys in the face so hard that they fell out of their chairs. He is not able to keep his hatred of me out of his conversation when he was still allowed to speak to the boys on the phone. He made Harrison cry on Father’s Day, the last time they spoke on the phone, because he began telling him what a whoring bitch his mother is. William then took the phone listened to his dad for about 20 seconds in which time Phil, I now know, accused William of having a sexual relationship with me and that is why William is on my side. William was always very afraid of his father and would never stand up to him like Rachel has. William finished by screaming into the phone, “you’re not my father anymore, I hate you, if you ever some around us again I’ll kill you!!!” He then threw the phone and broke it, punched three holes in the kitchen wall and ran out the back door. Since Phil heard Rachel and I trying to calm him down, he called the Twinsburg Police and reported William for domestic violence.

He has left messages recently for William and Rachel that are beyond abusive and so vile and disgusting that a normal person would not be able to think up something so painful and abusive. For William he left,
“Hey, Mr. William, does your Mom got you wearing a dress William? Are you her little pussy now, William? Does she make you wear a tampon, too, William? Where does she put it? Does she stick it up your ass, William? Don’t you love being Mommy’s little whipped dog? Does it feel good, William, having to take orders from some whoring cunt bitch?”

For Rachel he left,
“Hey, Princess Rachel, why don’t you take your skanky ass Mother and get your skanky ass self out of my house so I can raise the boys. You and your mother will fit right in with your skanky ass Nana, and your skanky ass Aunt Sherry and skanky ass Aunt Amy. You know you’d fit right in their, Rachel, with all your whoring bitch ways. You and your Cunt Mother deserve to live in the squalor with her relatives. Their all worthless pieces of shit, Rachel, so go.” (recorded)

In phone conversations to me, Phil has stated,
“I shoulda beat the shit out of you, Becky, then you’d know what abuse is. Just because you couldn’t stand up for your self like every other woman in the world, doesn’t make me a monster. I never hurt you. You’ve ruined all our lives, Becky. What do I have to live for? Tell me? I gave you the best years of my life and what do I have to show for it? If you weren’t going to stay married, why did you have those little boys? I never wanted to have them. I never wanted to have any kids that weren’t raised in a real family. Now look what you’ve done, Becky, you’ve ruined my life. I have nothing to live for and you’re going to get what you deserve.” (recorded)
“The police can’t stop me, the courts are on your side, Becky, but they can’t stop me either. You wait, Becky, whenever I want to, I’m gonna walk right up to you and rip your head right off and then I going to go and present it to the house.” (recorded)

In text messages, Phil has texted:

“I don’t need to drive 4,000 miles to give you what you deserve. Pesos have a wide coverage area.”

“If neither parent gets the boys, does the court give them to lisa or andy?”

“My life 22 yrs? Black balled army career by crazy wife who pushed me into army so id have a job good enough 2 ruin my life and family 4? U should pray that”

“severe debt to which I am certain I will repay you…Only you, Becky, could be so easily brainwashed ”

“Luv in spoonfuls I miss u”

I have the saved text messages and many, many recorded conversations and recorded messages.
The Twinsburg Police have an outstanding warrant for Phil’s arrest for breach of protection order and menacing.
The North Canton Police prosecutor has asked me to come and sign a written statement and they will be filing a second charge for breach of protection order, which, as a second offense, is a Fifth Degree Felony. I was in North Canton when I received the text messages in which Phil made reference to hiring someone from Texas to come here and kill me.


Becky Jose

Our Full Story

My Active-Duty Army husband was arrested for Attempted Aggravated Murder of me in April 2009. YES, OF ME!! Married 23 years with 4 children, my husband was diagnosed with PTSD after the Gulf War in 1990. After 9/11, Phil felt he should go back into the Army to "do his part" again. He joined the Reserves and got an Active Duty assignment. The Army sent him on two back to back tours in Afghanistan. He had been getting more and more controlling, more jealous, more unable to control his rage and anger, especially as our kids got older. They weren't very good at "tip-toeing" around their Dad, trying to keep his anger under control. Unfortunately, I had become very good at it since the Gulf War. I decided to file for divorce in Nov 2006. Phil evaded the process server and became threatening and more abusive. I just needed to be away from him. He became more coercive and dangerous. I gave him "one more chance" after his return from his first tour in Afghanistan. It took less than a week for his raging to start again. I felt trapped by his anger, his control of all of the family resources, his mental state. He left for Afghanistan a second time, stopped paying our mortgage to punish me and the kids, refused to give us any money. When he returned, I filed for a Civil Order of Protection, filed for divorce again, and made sure he couldn't get to me (April/May2008). Our children were added to the Protection Order because he couldn't keep his raging belligerence from them-he never did. He continued to break the protection order over 1,000 times from May 08 to March 2009. I have recorded VMs; text messaged death threats, conversations with death threats. I gave all this info to the police and to my husbands commanders (he is a MAJOR by the way.) They Army got tired of dealing with him and let him leave TX to come to Ohio and kill me. He was arrested for Attempted Aggravated Murder, Menacing by Stalking, Felony Breach of Protection, Possession of Criminal Tools (was arrested at my "hiding house" with a Torture Kit in his car. His commander took away from Phil a personal long-range Sniper Rifle the day he was given leave (a felony by itself). Two weeks prior he had called 100 times in 4 hrs from his Unit phone leaving 30 VMS of a dry gun shooting over, and over and over. (To my cell and our two teens) and one MSG to our 17 yr. old daughter that said, "Guess What's Next..... Ask Your Dike Mother". He just pled guilty to Menacing by Stalking and Felony Breach of Protection. Local police messed up search, didn't Marandize, Attempted Aggravated Murder was dropped. The Army let him go to ruin his life, even though I had been working with them for months trying to get him the help he needed. I have been in therapy myself & my first therapist told me to form a safe exit strategy and get out. It took three years. I had been living off of spousal and child support and a part-time job (at Chico’s). We moved from our House of Hell to my own House of Peace. I have gotten NO INCOME from the Army since June 5th. I was a stay at home mother of four working from home, making extra but was not "allowed" to work outside the home. The Army has Transition Income for Domestic Violence victims, but it cannot be paid until the solder is convicted and separated. Because it was allowed to escalate, it wasn't just Dom Violence. My children and I have been through HELL all over again because of the Army and their negligence. I have found out that his commanders should have arrested him the first time they were aware he committed domestic violence (he texted death threats to me in Oct 2008). They were aware of his actions on hundreds of occasions. They did nothing. Since his arrest, all I get from anyone in the Army is "sorry, nothing we can do." If you could bring light on this, I know it could help. I have made some VMs available to listen to online. You, Oprah, have been an inspiration - with your guides to spiritual living and articles on what love really is, and how truly happy couples interact to meet BOTH partners needs. I had NO NEEDS for a long time - acknowledged, that is. I know the difference now. I was raised to DO for others to get attention. Because my husband has this public demeanor, "Major Jose", he was always very believable - the local police sent him home with me six times the last summer he was in our home. "Ma’am, he promises to leave you alone and stay in the basement." They never reported anything with child protective services that I found out they had an obligation to report. Close friends and near neighbors started to see the cracks. This has been an absolute nightmare. I just sidestepped an eviction notice this month. I don't know how much longer I can handle the pressure. Our kids are 19, 17, 9 and 8. My 19yr old son couldn't start college this fall (he has full-scholarship) because the private school that both my teens attended for 3 and 2 1/2yrs is suing me for unpaid tuition and they are withholding transcripts. My son, IQ near 140 with excellent grades, is looking at joining the Marines to help alleviate the financial strain on our family. I don't want him to exchange his life for money because of the Army and their failure to recognize the signs of suicide. Phil had 7 of 8 criteria from the VA website - one of which is "revenge seeking". (You only need one to be considered suicidal.) I have included the Affidavit that was filed with the divorce courts last December 2008. He became VERY abusive, even to the kids. On Dec 7th, he will be sentenced – max 6 ½ years. He is totally and completely psychologically disabled. He was facing 17 ½ yrs. Regardless, whenever he gets out, everyone I speak to in the Domestic Violence arena has told me that he will get out and kill me. He needs REAL help. The Army is trying to negate their responsibility. I cannot let them but I could REALLY use some help. I have contacted the VA, the Pentagon, US Congressman John Boccieri from Ohio, Army Inspector General, etc. Phil’s unit has not spoken to me since mid April after his arrest. His commander actually said to me, as I was checking into a domestic violence shelter, “Ma’am, if he were to be arrested, that would solve both our problems”. They saw my husband as a problem to get rid of. I saw him as having a problem that the Army caused and they had the obligation to address and take care of however they needed. --Not just cut him loose to hang himself. Phil was awarded the Bronze Star for Service in the Gulf War, Combat Infantryman’s Badge, Ranger Tab, Combat Patch with the 82nd Airborne Division, Jump Wings, Expert Field Medic Badge, he was prior service enlisted, was awarded a Green to Gold Scholarship for ROTC, graduated No. 1 in his college ROTC class, was Cadet Battalion Commander. This should NOT have been allowed to end up like this because the Army didn’t want to do their job.

Call me please. 330-966-6966

Voicemail of Final Threat

Phil left this message after leaving almost 30 voicemails of a gun dry firing over and over and over. Sometimes fast, sometimes slow. Very deliberate. This was the final message of the night. Two weeks before he was given leave.

WHAT HAVE YOU DONE, BECKY??

This is a recorded conversation where Phil tells me that no one will get near him. Whenever he wants he will rip my head off and "deliver it to the house". (Show the kids who the boss really is!!)

God's Will vs. Free Will

I have a very specific picture in my head of this. I have read a lot about the different methods for discerning the Will of God. I don't believe that God would leave the fate of humanity to the personal whims of an entire planet. And God doesn't speak to me directly, although if I want to know what he thinks about something, I go to the book that contains his voice, the Bible. "Delight in Me and I will give you the desires of your heart." God wants to give us what we want. But, more specifically, what we have wanted with a 'sustained longing'. Hear yourself saying it, "I have always wanted......." When I was 12, I wanted to be a doctor. At 42, a divorced mother of 4 children (Army Major ex-husband in jail awaiting trial for trying to kill me.), medical school seems a long shot. BUT, I'm finally finishing my BA in psychology. OOHHH!!! I never specifically said 'medical' doctor, and I will someday be a doctor - a PhD! And when people say, "What about Free Will?" Well, if God numbers the hairs on your head, then God's Will is in charge ultimately. How bout this?? God knows you SOOO well that He knows what your decision is going to be even before you make it. So, His Will is done, but not without us going in many directions and learning plenty of lessons along the way. If you have forgotten what the desires of your heart are, don't worry. God knows the heart of your desire and He will give you what it is you have always wanted, which is ultimately what God's Will has been all along!!!! Have patience that looks like 'anxious anticipation'. Like sitting on the edge of your seat. I see God's hand in every second of every day. And once you do, you literally can't wait for the Blessings God has in store for you!! No coincidence, every moment planned by God, every meeting arranged by Him, With Perfect Peace, Perfect Love, No conflict, real connections. I am so excited by just writing this!! My 'Love Tank' is on FULL, thanks to the love from Jesus, God the Father and the Holy Spirit.

Request Help Through Awareness

My name is Rebecca Jenise. Married for 23 years to Phil, a decorated, three-time war veteran. 4 kids, 19, 17, 9 and 8. I am also a victim of domestic violence. My husband is currently awaiting trial for Attempted Aggravated Murder, F-1, Felony Breach of Protection, F-3, Menacing by Stalking, F-4, & Possession of Criminal Tools, F-5. His trial is scheduled for Tues, Nov 3rd and I am in desperate need of some sort of help. I thought this would make a show that would never be forgotten. It would be more than thought provoking. It would motivate women to do something - BIG. If a man (or woman) has ever made you not do something out of fear of his violent reaction, you could be me someday.

I have tried every avenue. At my request, my U.S. Congressmen, John Boccieri, has started a congressional investigation. Also, at my request, the Army Inspector General has an ongoing investigation. Both of these sources are going to conclude that the Army failed in their duty to protect my children and myself. The evidence is well documented, as you will see. Unfortunately, none of them are able to help me with my most pressing issue. It is not money, although I have none. It is not future civil action, although that will be forthcoming. It is not future income, because that will begin at my husbands conviction. My real fear, even though I know I am in Gods constant sight and He would not forsake me, is that my husband is going to be out very soon. Too soon. He was facing 17½ years in prison. I have been told by every Domestic Violence expert, advocate or therapist that I have spoken with that as soon as my husband serves his jail time, regardless of the length, he is going to find me and kill me. No one has disagreed.

My husband was arrested in the beginning of April on charges of Attempted Aggravated Murder of me. When he was arrested outside my house here in North Canton, on the front passenger floor was a torture kit - a black duffel bag with abduction and torture devices, (zip-tie hand cuffs, duct tape, bolt cutters, tile nippers, sledge hammer, ball-pin hammer) all brand new with price tags attached. He had purchased enough restraints for all five of us. Unfortunately, the search of my husbands car at my house was found to be illegal and as a result, the torture kit is now suppressed as evidence. The case law the defense team cited was Arizona V. Gant. The ruling on this was not even handed down until after my husband was arrested.

How did we get here?

My husband, Phil, has had three war tours ~ Gulf War in 1990 &, recently, after taking a full-time active-duty position with the Army Reserve, he has been sent on two tours of duty, back2back, in Afghanistan. He was diagnosed in 1997 with PTSD at the VA Hospital in Brecksville, Ohio. He attended therapy & group therapy there for over a year. He was also severely physically and sexually abused as a child for over 10 years.

Phils behavior over the past years became more controlling, intimidating and physically threatening. He began threatening to kill me & I had to file for an Order of Protection for myself. The courts added our four children because he was making repeated death threats to me, threatening to kill our kids in front of me to punish me. He also left disturbing messages for our teens as well. I tried for the last 12 years of our marriage to get him help, more recently to force him into treatment, but nothing worked. (Don't worry, I now know how messed up this sounds.)

Since the granting of the Order of Protection, which was in April 08, my husband continually threatened and called thousands of times. His last contact with us was in the end of March. He called my cell phone 82 times in four hours from his Army Reserve Center in Texas, left 30 voice messages on my cell phone & teens cellphones of a gun shooting over and over, and one message to our 17 yr daughter that said, "Guess What Next........... Ask Your Dike Mother". His Army unit commanders were aware of all of this, including the protection order, texted death threats, the voicemails, recorded conversations and the outstanding warrants for Breach of Protection.

Two weeks later the Army took from him a long-range sniper rifle. He had never owned a personal weapon and was banned from purchasing or having any weapons. This is a felony that his unit failed to arrest him on. Then, they gave him seven days leave to drive round trip from Texas to Ohio (1800 miles one-way) to conduct personal business and get his misdemeanors cleared up. He has no other family in Ohio and no real reason for coming here.

The commander called the North Canton Police and let them know my husband was coming into their jurisdiction. They suggested that I enter a Domestic Violence Shelter for my own safety. At arrival, I spoke to THE LTC who granted Phils leave. He told me, "Maam, if your husband were to be arrested, that would solve both of our problems".

I had been receiving spousal and child support from his military pay through the State of Ohio. He was served with divorce papers in June of 2008 in the Fayetteville, NC jail after finding our two youngest sons and me at a hotel. He recognized our van from the road. Because of the protection order, he threatened to drown our little boys in front of me if I called the police in order to get him away from me. The hotel staff called the police.

As if this nightmare is not enough, on June 7th, 2009, the Army changed his status to confined and he no longer receives his Army pay. As a result, I no longer get spousal or child support from his pay. I will receive Transition Income for Domestic Violence Victims from the Army but not until my husband is convicted.

My husband's family will no longer speak to our kids or me. After having been estranged from his family for ten years, they are now completely supporting him and somehow this is all my fault. His father is a retired Montgomery County consumer protection attorney. His sister is a corporate attorney. She was going to put up the $100,000 cash bond required to have my husband released until the Judge ruled to allow the prosecutor to request a hearing before any release at which time the bond would be increased to such an extent as to prevent his release. They refuse to believe that he really came here to kill me. An Army officer came forward from Texas and is flying in for the trial to testify that Phil told hime that he was only coming to Ohio to "kill his wife" - only in much more colorful words.

This whole thing has been one long nightmare for our four children and myself. I have consistently prayed that my husband be healed for many years. More recently, I started praying for relief from his abuse. Since this is the relief that God has provided, I fully accept it.

I am extremely easy-going and dislike conflict but have learned to see and recognize the signs of abuse. My faith and my own childhood made me try for too long to get help for my husband. I have since gotten the help I needed to be strong enough to get away from him. I can now be the woman God intended for me to be, not what my husband would allow me to be. I have decided to finish my degree in Psychology and get my PhD.

I have spent five years in weekly therapy and reading and studying well over 100 books on Co-dependency, Personality Disorders (Axis II Borderline, Narcissistic, Anti-Social), Personality types, Inner Child Healing, Emotional Abuse, Child Neglect, Helping Witnesses, Enlightened Witnesses, PTSD, Suicidal Behavior, Recognizing Real Love, Discerning the Will of God, etc. I am writing three books currently. The first is about my Exit Strategy and how I safely got away from a mad man. The second is about how to recognize abuse, how jealousy and control turn into abuse, and how to recognize abusive personalities in general. The third, a topic which is so overlooked, not just recognizing abusive behavior and getting out, but how to help women recognize WHY they got into these types of relationships to begin with, and how to heal themselves. After all, God will keep sending the lessons He wants us to learn from life over and over and over until we learn the lesson. I learned my lesson the first time. But how many women and men get into the same relationship over and over, but with different abusers each time?

I am not just a need to know person. I am a need to know WHY person. My intelligence level actually added to my abuse. I have really been able to do so many things in my life using my intellect that I just thought that fixing my husband would be something I could do. But immature 'magical thinking" and denial helped me stay in that unhealthy place. I have never failed at anything that I did not give up on, so if I just didn't give up, I would prevail. Divorce is failure & failure was not an option. I was just that determined, or should I say arrogant. I have been humbled, have I not?

If there is any way you or your staff could provide some national coverage on this case, even if it is just raising the level of awareness to these types of situations, I would be forever grateful. Perhaps this could be the beginning of people recognizing just how dangerous these types of men are so that we can take them seriously. The only reason that our country has not addressed truly intense situations like mine in the past is that the other wives, girlfriends or significant others are all dead. The only protection I am able to provide for myself is that of awareness. I must make more people aware of this type of severe emotional, psychological and mental abuse. If for no other reason than to save myself yet again when he is released.

I can provide all the recorded messages, text messages, and recorded conversations that I gave to the police. They are chilling.